If there’s one thing I get sick of it’s my mom complaining that because of her work schedule she doesn’t get enough “quality time” with me. Yeah, right. When she finally drags her sorry ass into my after-school program and gets me home do we immediately start playing a rousing game of Candy Land? Do we kick off a round of Hide and Seek? Fat freaking chance. The FIRST thing that happens is she says she, “Needs a moment” after her 10 hour day. Boo freaking hoo. My school day wasn’t exactly a cake-walk. During recess, while playing “Cat Hospital,” I had to operate on four sick kitty cats … I was scheduled to do five operations but Emma freaked out and ran away. Look lady, I take my job seriously, too.
Anyway after she’s had her “moment” and “unwinds” (whatever the hell that means) do we finally enjoy some “quality time?” You tell me:
bedtimesareforsuckers.com 
February 28, 2012 at 8:14 pm
F’in brilliant. I LOVE the chart. When are you going to do a book? A cartoon? A mini-series?
February 29, 2012 at 6:17 am
Hilarious and true for so many. I especially love the playing interactive and engaging ames with the kids percent. LMAO
February 29, 2012 at 6:22 am
I look forward to this blog so much – possibly even more than my monthly Southern Living magazine arriving at the doorstep. I swear this is like my kid (and me….). Great, great job. Would love to see that book/cartoon/miniseries. Hilarious. Just hilarious.
February 29, 2012 at 8:56 am
YOU ROCK!!! SO Friggin creative – my favorite blog…:)
February 29, 2012 at 12:49 pm
This is awesome. My favorite part is that the title of the chart (when you scroll over it) is “charty.” JT on SNL…hilarious. Now, I have to go obsessively check my Facebook.
February 29, 2012 at 8:38 pm
I swear my kindergarten write this…….Isabella, is that you? Go to bed!
February 29, 2012 at 8:58 pm
Yeah. And you call this quality time? Don’t make me have to put on my high heels and come up there. — A very tough, busy, and tired mom. Don’t call me from college for money, kid.
March 1, 2012 at 8:19 am
Oh, nevermind – I thought this was from a teenager.
March 11, 2012 at 8:33 pm
I’m really surprised Guzzling wine wasn’t more than 10%…..
March 15, 2012 at 1:13 pm
The chart is pretty accurate, except the 1% enforcing time-outs would go to 11% guzzling wine. Seriously.
April 4, 2012 at 12:29 am
Brilliant!!!! You caught me, young blogger.